Books > Old Books > Getting The Most Out Of Life (1948)


Page 89

How to win Friends and Influence People

and even take pride in our frankness. But not if someone else is trying to ram the unpalatable fact down our throat.
In his biography, Ben Franklin tells how he conquered the iniquitous habit of argument and made himself one of the most able diplomats in American history. One day, when Franklin was a blundering youth, an old Quaker friend took him aside and lashed him with a few stinging truths: "Ben, your opinions have a slap in them for everyone who differs with you. Your friends find they enjoy themselves better when you are not around. You know so much that no man can tell you anything. Indeed no man is going to try, for the effort would lead only to discomfort. So you are not likely ever to know any more than you do now, which is very little."
Ben Franklin was wise enough to realize that this was true, and he made a right-about-face. "I made it a rule," said Franklin, "to forbear all direct contradiction to the sentiments of others, and all positive assertion of my own. I even forbade myself the use of every expression that imported a fix'd opinion, such as `undoubtedly,' and adopted, instead, `I conceive,' a thing to be so; or `it so appears to me at present.' When another asserted something that I thought an error, I deny'd myself the pleasure of contradicting him abruptly, and in answering I began by observing that in certain cases or circumstances his opinion would be right, but in the present case there seem'd to me some difference.
"This became at length so habitual that perhaps for 50 years past no one has ever heard a dogmatical expression escape me. And to this habit (after my character of integrity) I think it principally owing that I had early so much weight with my fellow citizens when I proposed new institutions, or alterations in the old, and so much influence in public councils."
When You're in the Wrong
WHEN one is at fault, it is frequently disarming if you admit it quickly. Ferdinand E. Warren, a commercial artist, used this technique with a petulant art director. "Recently I delivered him a

travel books:
where is HTML where is HEAD where is TITLE and even take pride in our frankness. But not if someone else is trying to ram what is unpalatable fact down our throat. In his biography, Ben Franklin tells how he conquered what is iniquitous habit of argument and made himself one of what is most able diplomats in American history. One day, when Franklin was a blundering youth, an old Quaker friend took him aside and lashed him with a few stinging truths: "Ben, your opinions have a slap in them for everyone who differs with you. Your friends find they enjoy themselves better when you are not around. You know so much that no man can tell you anything. Indeed no man is going to try, for what is effort would lead only to discomfort. So you are not likely ever to know any more than you do now, which is very little." Ben Franklin was wise enough to realize that this was true, and he made a right-about-face. "I made it a rule," said Franklin, "to forbear all direct contradiction to what is sentiments of others, and all positive assertion of my own. I even forbade myself what is use of every expression that imported a fix'd opinion, such as `undoubtedly,' and adopted, instead, `I conceive,' a thing to be so; or `it so appears to me at present.' When another asserted something that I thought an error, I deny'd myself what is pleasure of contradicting him abruptly, and in answering I began by observing that in certain cases or circumstances his opinion would be right, but in what is present case there seem'd to me some difference. "This became at length so habitual that perhaps for 50 years past no one has ever heard a dogmatical expression escape me. And to this habit (after my character of integrity) I think it principally owing that I had early so much weight with my fellow citizens when I proposed new institutions, or alterations in what is old, and so much influence in public councils." When You're in what is Wrong WHEN one is at fault, it is frequently disarming if you admit it quickly. Ferdinand E. Warren, a commercial artist, used this technique with a petulant art director. "Recently I delivered him a where is meta name="keywords" content="old books, Free book , free book offer , free audio books , free coloring book pages , free book reports , free audio book , audio books free download , book free , free guest book , books free , free book summaries , download free audio books , free childrens books." where is where are they now rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="../../style.css" where is meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1" where is BODY bgColor=#ffffff text="#000000" where are they now ="#000000" v where are they now ="#FF0000" where is p where is div align="center" where is strong where is strong where is a href="http://www.aaoldbooks.com" Books > where is a href="../default.asp" title="Book" Old Books > where is strong where is a href="default.asp" Getting what is Most Out Of Life (1948) where is table width="700" border="1" align="center" cellpadding="15" cellspacing="0" where is center where is tr where is td width="160" align="center" valign="top" where is div align="center" where is td align="center" valign="top" where is div align="left" where is div align="JUSTIFY" where is p align="left" Page 89 where is p align="center" where is strong How to win Friends and Influence People where is p and even take pride in our frankness. But not if someone else is trying to ram what is unpalatable fact down our throat. In his biography, Ben Franklin tells how he conquered what is iniquitous habit of argument and made himself one of what is most able diplomats in American history. One day, when Franklin was a blundering youth, an old Quaker friend took him aside and lashed him with a few stinging truths: "Ben, your opinions have a slap in them for everyone who differs with you. Your friends find they enjoy themselves better when you are not around. You know so much that no man can tell you anything. Indeed no man is going to try, for what is effort would lead only to discomfort. So you are not likely ever to know any more than you do now, which is very little." Ben Franklin was wise enough to realize that this was true, and he made a right-about-face. "I made it a rule," said Franklin, "to forbear all direct contradiction to what is sentiments of others, and all positive assertion of my own. I even forbade myself what is use of every expression that imported a fix'd opinion, such as `undoubtedly,' and adopted, instead, `I conceive,' a thing to be so; or `it so appears to me at present.' When another asserted something that I thought an error, I deny'd myself what is pleasure of contradicting him abruptly, and in answering I began by observing that in certain cases or circumstances his opinion would be right, but in what is present case there seem'd to me some difference. "This became at length so habitual that perhaps for 50 years past no one has ever heard a dogmatical expression escape me. And to this habit (after my character of integrity) I think it principally owing that I had early so much weight with my fellow citizens when I proposed new institutions, or alterations in what is old, and so much influence in public councils." When You're in what is Wrong WHEN one is at fault, it is frequently disarming if you admit it quickly. Ferdinand E. Warren, a commercial artist, used this technique with a petulant art director. "Recently I delivered him a where is Server.Execute("_SiteMap.asp") %

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